Summer Travel Wonders

For many reasons, both business and pleasure, I’ve had the opportunity to travel far from home at least a half dozen times so far this summer. From Vancouver, BC to Dallas, Texas, Mammoth Lakes, California to Missoula, Montana and destinations in between – my comings and goings have allowed my over-curious mind to wonder in places I don’t usually go; literally. For example:
I wonder … if women aren’t buying pairs of the popular (and super expensive) Lululemon yoga pants for flying across the country more than for sessions on a yoga mat? The ubiquitous black stretchy pants would seem to be a part of every other female flyer’s wardrobe these days. Maybe in addition to the “Downward-Facing Dog” and “Cobra” poses, they are practicing a new pose called the “Flying Sardine.” 

I wonder … who ever thought that switching to electronic hotel room keys was a good idea? At our hotel in Missoula last week, the cards that were supposed to be programed to open our room had to be re-set at least twice a day if not more. The code would be scrambled and useless if you put the card near anything electronic (like a cell phone) or even another credit card (like in your wallet). Gee, now who would ever put a plastic, credit-card-sized card into a wallet for safekeeping? Call me old school, but you never have to reprogram a metal key.
I wonder … what committee of bureaucratic chuckle-heads decided that the best time to repave miles and miles of The Going-To-The-Sun two lane highway in Glacier National Park would be during the month of August, otherwise known as the peak of tourism season when more cars than at any other time of the year are pouring into the park on the only road from Apgar Village to Logan Pass? Sitting and waiting – and waiting – parked on fresh, hot asphalt for up to an hour at a time under the sweltering summer sun, waiting for traffic coming the other direction to clear so you can finally move another mile or so to the where the next flagman is stopping traffic, does not make for fond vacation memories. Just sayin’.
I wonder … how dogs seem to instinctively know when their owners will be going out of town days before the suitcases even come out? Our two young pups (7 & 8 months) started shadowing my every move and watching me like a 32-ounce slab of prime Angus beef about a week before leaving for Montana this month. And when I finally did drag our suitcases out from the attic? Pure puppy pandemonium.

I wonder … why every hotel room planner insists on positioning a massive, wall-to-wall mirror directly opposite the bathtub/shower enclosure. I mean, give a middle-aged guy a break! For my own safety and mental health, I make it a habit to look anywhere but at the mirror whenever I get into the shower. Then, I make sure to turn the water temperature up high enough that the cursed mirror will be good and fogged when I shut the water off, draw back the flimsy curtain to grab a towel. By the time any reflection can once again be seen in the mirror, I’m well on the way to being fully dressed. One morning last week in Missoula, however, when I was bending over the tub to check the water temperature, I thought something had fallen over on the hotel room sink so I looked back and accidentally caught a glimpse of the mirror. I’m pretty sure I let out a yelp of horror. How did a Tolkien-worthy troll/goblin-thing get into the bathroom with me? And why was it getting into my shower? Oh, right. Never mind.
After all of my travels this summer, there’s one thing I definitely do not wonder about at all; why people always say “there’s no place like home.”
I’ll see you ‘round town.